Life of purpose
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- Written by: Life of purpose
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What if you only had 2 months to change your life?
Take this self-assessment Test:
The following questionnaire is designed to assess the habits and tendencies that contribute to your imbalances. It is divide3dinto three sections. Our suggestion is that you read through all the questions first and cross put the ones that do not fit you at all. Then go back and reread the remaining questions, this time assigning a value to each question that indicates how well it describes your personal experience and tendencies.
Given that you may have expressed different tendencies at different times in your life, we suggest that you answer these questions by keeping in mind your present state of mind. Use the following scale:
1. It applies to me infrequently.
2. It applies to me with some regularity.
3. It applies to me strongly.
At the end of each section write down your total score.
Finally, consider asking someone who knows you well to answer the questionnaire on your behalf. Compare his or her responses to yours. Use any discrepancies to further fine tune your assessment of yourself.
Section 1
1. People say that I respond to stress with fear.
2. I worry about people disliking me.
3. I become overly sensitive to criticism.
4. I have difficulty coping with uncertainty.
5. I feel that my needs are not met in any way.
6. I have difficulty trusting my own judgements.
7. Y energy level waxes and wanes.
8. If I don’t get sufficient downtime, I easily succumb to physical illnesses.
9. My thinking becomes scattered when I feel stressed.
10. My memory becomes irregular when I feel stressed.
11. I frequently have difficulty concentrating on tasks.
12. I often have trouble falling asleep.
13. I feel weak and nervous.
14. My enthusiasm and liveliness plummet but I can still pick myself up easily.
15. I lose hope easily but can regain it quickly.
16. I can bounce back from disappointments relatively easily.
17. I become moody – I feel as if I am riding an emotional roller coaster.
18. I feel restless and fretful most of the time.
19. I can’t organize and manage my time well.
20. I have difficulty following through on tasks.
21. I feel as if I can’t depend on myself (my body) to get things done.
22. I believe that the grass is always greener on the other side, so I get twinges of envy.
23. When depressed, I feel a void that nothing can fill.
24. I fear that people wouldn’t like me if they really knew how I felt inside.
25. I grow impatient, wanting things to change.
26. I easily grow disenchanted with life.
27. I have only fleeting moments of satisfaction.
28. When depressed I feel deprived and I worry about all the things I don’t have.
29. I am inconsistent in my daily routine, or I lose control of my daily routine.
30. I become overly sensitive to other people’s perceptions of me and responses to me.
31. Dealing with change becomes increasingly stressful.
32. My first symptom of depression is feeling insecure and anxious.
33. I worry excessively about the future.
34. I feel easily overwhelmed by change.
35. I crave stimulants such as coffee and cigarettes to keep up my energy.
36. I create fearful scenarios in my mind.
37. I am easily excitable.
38. When I am not stressed, I am enthusiastic and vivacious by nature.
39. I worry that bad things are going to happen.
40. I ruminate about the events of the day.
41. When I am depressed, my appetite shuts down and I don’t feel hunger.
42. People say that my mind appears to be somewhere else.
43. I have difficulty making decisions, or I can’t make up my mind about things.
44. My mind gets caught up in unproductive over-activity.
45. I feel that everything I do is not good enough.
46. I ruminate on potential problems.
47. I experience moments of despair.
48. When stressed, I feel my physical resources eroding.
49. I feel a lack of self-worth.
50. When I feel depressed, my greatest wish is to feel anchored and joyous once again.
Section 2
1. People say that I respond to stress with anger.
2. I feel easily frustrated.
3. Initially I have lots of energy so I can handle stressful events fairly easily at first.
4. I believe that I put forth more effort than anyone else does, and without complaint.
5. Because I like to work hard, long and fast, I often feel revved up, overly energized and pressured.
6. I tend to overdo everything.
7. I worry that people are going to let me down, so I keep the world at a distance.
8. I feel betrayed when people let me down.
9. I am constantly comparing myself to others to see how I measure up.
10. When depressed, I fear that I am not good enough.
11. I experience a great deal of mental pressure.
12. My sleep is disrupted.
13. I set unrealistically high expectations of myself.
14. I set unrealistically high expectations of others.
15. I fail to appreciate my efforts.
16. I fail to appreciate the efforts of others.
17. People say that I push myself too hard.
18. When I am under stress my thinking becomes rigid.
19. I feel as if I am not getting enough done.
20. People say that I become self-centred and block out everything around me, including other people.
21. People say that I become aggressive in my desire to accomplish things.
22. My body feels rigid and upright.
23. I like things to go my way; when they don’t, I become irritated.
24. When I am depressed, everything becomes very serious to me and I lose my sense of humor.
25. I tend to grow resentful of others’ lack of participation and effort.
26. I respond to frustration by becoming irritable.
27. People say I become increasingly competitive with myself and others.
28. I become increasingly compulsive in my routine.
29. I always keep my goal in sight.
30. I don’t lose motivation easily.
31. People say that I am often crabby.
32. Being regarded as competent is exceedingly important to me.
33. I become impatient very easily.
34. I value efficiency and attention to details.
35. When stressed, I know what I need to comfort myself.
36. I seek anything that will help me to get rid of tension in my body.
37. Although I am usually warm and engaging, when I am stressed I behave in an angry and demanding manner.
38. When depressed, I grow increasingly intolerant of people and things.
39. I feel the need to take control of things because people are not doing things “right”.
40. My mind gets caught up in criticism and judgment.
41. Nothing seems just right; everything could be made better.
42. I tend to fly off the handle.
43. When stressed, I become more goal-oriented, but I grow impatient with my perceived lack of productivity.
44. When I am stressed, my appetite increases.
45. I disregard physical discomfort until it becomes unbearable.
46. I have difficulty identifying my emotions.
47. I have difficulty saying no, but then I feel resentment building up from the demands that are placed upon me.
48. I feel betrayed and can grow bitter.
49. My interest in matters of the spirit quickly wanes when I am faced with disillusionment.
50. When I am depressed, my greatest wish is to feel supported and understood.
Section 3
1. People say that I respond to stress with inertia.
2. I fear that people will abandon me if I express negative emotions such as anger and sorrow.
3. People say that I go into denial when I am stressed – I tend to let things get very bad before I deal with problems.
4. I worry that people will think I am a bad person.
5. I am unable to express my wants and needs because I am uncertain of what I feel.
6. My emotional steadiness becomes a sense of feeling stuck.
7. I don’t confront people instead I stifle my emotions.
8. I blame myself for everything.
9. I shut down emotionally when I am upset.
10. When depressed, I feel emotionally numb.
11. People say that the first sign they notice when I am becoming depressed is that I am hard to read.
12. When I am stressed, at first I respond with calmness, endurance, and stability.
13. I freeze under excessive pressure.
14. I stop taking care of myself when I am depressed.
15. I lose motivation when I am depressed.
16. I lose motivation when I am depressed.
17. Prolonged stress makes my mind sluggish and plodding.
18. The first sign of depression is that I feel lifeless.
19. I have difficulty motivating myself to move.
20. I feel as if my brain won’t function, so my thinking is dulled.
21. Although I am otherwise content, when I am depressed my life seems boring.
22. I feel as if I am carrying the world on my shoulders.
23. I can’t get rid of my fatigue.
24. One of the first signs of depression is that I lose interest in physical activity.
25. When depressed, I withdraw emotionally from those around me.
26. Eating my favorite food comforts me.
27. When stressed, I feel physically sluggish.
28. When stressed, I feel emotionally listless.
29. When depressed, I tend to oversleep.
30. I feel drowsy after eating.
31. I grow increasingly set in my ways and unable to adapt to change.
32. I like to engage in activities that are relaxing.
33. When stressed, I grow increasingly attached to my possessions.
34. People say that I grow emotionally clingy when I am depressed.
35. I have trouble remaining focused and alert.
36. When stressed, I grow increasingly inefficient and more plodding in my performance.
37. I stuff away my emotions.
38. I feel alone and alienated.
39. Usually forgiving by nature, I hold on to hurt feelings when I am depressed.
40. I feel a sense of apathy.
41. I easily become overly sentimental.
42. When depressed, I find great comfort in familiar people, places and things.
43. I long for the way things used to be.
44. When stressed, I tend to overeat and gain weight easily.
45. I feel hopeless and can’t imagine a way out of things.
46. People say that I become increasingly passive— I can’t do anything to change my attitude.
47. I feel stuck in a rut but feel powerless to change- I want someone to do it for me.
48. People’s demands of me hurt my feelings.
49. I feel anxious and irritable at the thought of stimulating activity.
50. When I am depressed, my greatest wish is to feel alive and energetic.
Maximizing Your Plan of Action
Interpreting the results of this questionnaire can give you insight into how you express yourself and interact with the world. A three-step process is required. Please follow each step sequentially. First, define your unique expression of depression; second, identify the patterns, tendencies, and themes that emerge in your life; third, create a tailor-made program for yourself – one that offers long-term solutions and also addresses immediate needs. Let’s begin.
Step 1: Define Your Unique Expression of Depression:
What if you fit neatly into one category?
If this is the case with you, you likely resonated with the questions in a single section. If Section 1 best describes your experience, you have a predominance of symptoms, that fit the archetype of Airy Depression. Your main doshic imbalance is Vata. If your experience is best described in Section 2, you are experiencing a predominance of symptoms that fit the archetype of Burning Depression. Your main doshic imbalance is Pitta. If your experience is best described in Section 3, you are experiencing a predominance of symptoms that fit the archetype of Earthy Depression. Your main doshic imbalance is Kapha.
Now Proceed to step 2.
What if you did not fit neatly into one category?
A large number of people straddle two categories, and some even demonstrate characteristics of all three archetypes. If this is the case with you, add up the scores for each section. If your score is significantly higher in one section than in the others, this section corresponds to your archetype of depression.
What if all of your scores are similar? If they are too close in value to help you discriminate one section from the others, identify which section has the highest number of statements with a rating of 5. This section will best describe your predominant manifestation of depression.
Is what you have now determined really your predominant manifestation of depression? Check in with yourself. Does this make sense ot you? You have read the cases and are familiar with the experiences that people have with Airy, Burning, or Earthy Depression. Where do you think you fit in best?
Step 2 : Refine Your assessment?
Now we want to refine your assessment. The goal of this exercise is to help pinpoint the area of your mind-body that is most affected by the experience of depression. The value of this is that you can use this information to help you identify a starting point for your healing interventions.
Whether or not you distinctly fit into one of the three archetypes, review all your answers in each section. Highlight the questions to which you assigned a rating of 5. If you like, write them down on a piece of paper.
1. Put a “p” next to the questions that pertain to the physical aspect of your being.
2. Put an “m” next to the questions that pertain to the mental aspect of your being.
3. Put an “e” next to the questions that pertain to the emotional aspect of your being.
In order to aid you in this process, we have evaluated the questions ourselves. You may wish to compare your designations to ours. However, it is our recommendation that you label your questions before you check our designations, because we want you to reflect upon the questions and your responses to them. This is an important exercise in and of itself. It is by improving your awareness that you awaken the physician within, thereby accomplishing the primary goal of Ayurveda.
By assigning a value to the question yourself, you are bringing awareness to the different aspects of your being. We encourage you to use this kind of thinking in your everyday life. Imbalances come and go. If your awareness is primed, you will easily be able to identify an imbalance when it occurs, as well as the area in which it is affecting you, and you will know what to pull out of your Ayurvedic toolbox to help you to regain balance.
As you look over your answers in each section, which sub-category stands out the most? The answer to this question reveals the aspect of your being that is most affected by your doshic imbalance. Does it appear that depression is mostly affecting the physical, mental or emotional aspect of your physiology? Are these results congruent wish your experience of depression? Do these results offer you additional insight into your predicament?
Step 3: Identify a Starting Point for your Journey
The ultimate goal in defining and refining your assessment of depression is to utilize this knowledge to create a tailor made program that offers long-term solutions. Based on your answers for step 2, identify which aspect of your being is in the most immediate need of attention. This will be your starting point.
Although it is true that in the long run, every agent of vitality presented in this book will help the totality of your being, each has a distinct domain where it is most immediately efficacious. Finding an agent of vitality that directly address the aspect of your mind-body that is most currently affected will expedite the process of undoing depression.
What if most of your symptoms relate to your physical well-being? Consider which of the following interventions will best suit your needs:
· Regulating your sleep patterns
· Evaluating how you are supporting your mind-body with nutrition.
· Starting an exercise program
What if most of your symptoms relate to your ability to process thoughts? Consider which of the following interventions will best suit your needs:
· Joining a yoga class
· Practicing breathing techniques
What if most of your symptoms relate to your ability to process emotions? Consider which of the following interventions will best suit your needs:
· Becoming serious about meditation
· Embracing a new paradigm of life
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- Written by: Saraswati Raman
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Building social confidence is a gradual process that involves self-reflection, practice, and patience. Here are some steps to help you gain social confidence:
1. Self-awareness:
· Reflect on your strengths and weaknesses.
· Identify areas where you feel less confident socially.
2. Set realistic goals:
· Start with small, achievable social goals.
· Gradually increase the difficulty as you become more comfortable.
3. Positive self-talk:
· Challenge negative thoughts about yourself.
· Replace self-critical thoughts with positive and encouraging ones.
4. Practice active listening:
· Pay close attention to what others are saying.
· Ask follow-up questions to show genuine interest.
5. Eye contact and body language:
· Maintain eye contact to convey confidence.
· Practice open and positive body language.
6. Initiate small talk:
· Start conversations with simple topics.
· Comment on the surroundings or share a relevant observation.
7. Join social activities:
· Participate in group activities or clubs where you share common interests.
· This provides a natural setting for social interaction.
8. Learn from others:
· Observe confident individuals and how they handle social situations.
· Model positive behaviors you admire.
9. Accept imperfection:
· Understand that everyone makes social mistakes.
· Learn from experiences and don't be too hard on yourself.
10.Celebrate successes:
· Acknowledge and celebrate your social achievements, no matter how small.
· This reinforces positive behavior.
11.Expand comfort zones:
· Gradually challenge yourself by engaging in activities that push your social boundaries.
· Each success builds confidence for the next challenge.
12.Take care of yourself:
· Maintain physical and mental well-being through exercise, proper nutrition, and adequate sleep.
· Feeling good about yourself contributes to social confidence.
13.Visualization:
· Imagine successful social interactions in your mind.
· Visualization can help reduce anxiety and increase confidence.
14.Seek feedback:
· Ask trusted friends for constructive feedback on your social interactions.
· Use this information to make positive adjustments.
15.Professional help:
· If social anxiety or lack of confidence is significantly impacting your life, consider seeking guidance from a therapist or counselor.
Remember that building social confidence is a process that takes time and persistence. Be patient with yourself and celebrate the progress you make along the way.
